One of my favorite things about my new job is that many of the other teachers are like me – women who have moved to Tokyo to be with their boyfriends/husbands. It’s not easy to meet English-speaking women in Japan, and it’s even harder to meet women you would be friends with without the Japan connection. This is a sad state for a girl like me. Back in the US, time with friends was a big part of my life. I can’t remember how many dinner parties we held at Big Brown (our house in Portland), but I know it was a lot. I miss spontaneous coffee and breakfast dates, afternoons at the spa or nail salon, Mt Tabor picnics, and just plain old chilling out and talking with friends. And while it’s nice to focus on other things right now, and while it’s great to have this time with Driscoll, I’ve definitely been feeling a social lack.
I met my friend Joanna at the school. She’s a British gal, but lived in NYC for six years prior to moving to Tokyo. Somehow, since she and her husband have been in Japan Joanna has managed to rack up quite a long list of girlfriends. I’m not sure how she’s done it. But she has enough of them that she was able to hold an almost crowded dinner party at her apartment (maybe that’s not saying much considering the size of Tokyo apartments). Of course I was pretty excited about this night with the girls.
The get-together felt a lot like being at a dinner party back in The States. One difference was that her apartment is a high rise with a great view (I wish we had prioritized a view when apartment hunting. Why was I so paranoid about the earthquake?). Instead of large dishes of food, the food was miniature – mini quiches cooked five at a time, mini savory scones, and small stovetop cooked or bought dishes (not much room for cooking or for storing large bowls/platters here). Another difference was that after spending almost an entire year in partial isolation with Driscoll, I felt sort of socially retarded, uncomfortable and shy without him by my side (tell me we're not turning into one of those couples). I was also questioning whether or not the comments I made were appropriate. Is it inappropriate to laugh about the seemingly perverted Japanese men with their primped out, fully clothed, prissy, miniature French poodles? But by the end of the night, I’d had a really nice time and met some very cool women. Now the trick is to stop telling myself - I already have friends, they’re just four to seven thousand miles away - and actually start calling some of the girls I’ve met here, hop on a train and go visit with them.
